3 Tips that Might Cause Offense

October 12, 2018 | Andrew Kurtz

[Warning: This post may offend you!]

The world is telling me that Love is Love. That all religions should Coexist. That I need to be tolerant of the beliefs I don’t support.

But I can’t.

The truth is I can’t be who the world wants me to be. I have to be who God wants me to be. And what I see God saying, what I see Jesus living, is not tolerance of every action, belief, or lifestyle. It’s the opposite. God is profoundly intolerant.

Just look. Adam and Eve were banished from the garden after sinning just once (Genesis 3:23-24). God wiped out all of humanity except Noah and his family because of wickedness (Genesis 6:5-8). Jesus said quite plainly, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me” (John 14:6).

Sin in scripture is not taken lightly. Ever. But thank God for the grace of Jesus!

Here’s the deal. If the world complains every time you speak up for what you believe, and if it drops an onslaught of “you intolerant [insert bad word here]” on you, you might actually be doing something right. Isn’t that what happened to Jesus? And Paul? And like all of the disciples? They took a beating for being different and believing different.

Pause for a moment and hear this. Please don’t take this as a spiritual permission slip to throw hate and judgment at the sinners and lost people of the world. Yes, stand apart and speak out for God, but remember the plank in your own eye. Intolerance should not look like hate.

But if someone is willing to sit down and engage in a dialogue, maybe these thoughts will help:

#1. Tolerance ≠ Love.

1 John 4:7 - "Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.”

I believe beyond any doubt that sin leads to death, and if someone I know is openly, willingly living in sin, I cannot stand by and watch them die. Love says, “Your actions are hurting you. And because I love you, I am going to hold you accountable.” Tolerance says, “I don’t mind that you’re hurting yourself, and I don’t want to risk being on your bad side.”

A couple years ago, I was a really selfish person. I was noticeably and annoyingly looking for how I would benefit from every interaction. And can I just say how frustrating and humbling it was to get called out on it by Pastor Clint Schwartz. Step by step, my thoughts went from “Shut it, Clint” to “What do you mean?” to “Oh, I see what you mean” to “Can you help me?”

It took Clint three or four “interventions” over the course of a year, but little by little, I found myself recognizing my selfishness for what it was and working toward change.

Sure, this isn’t exactly the complicated conversation that comes with conflicting religious or political beliefs, but Clint’s response was a Jesus response. He wasn’t going to let me stay the way I was if the way I was led me into sin.  

#2. Faith in Christ may cause some relational rifts.

Matthew 10:22 - "You will be hated by everyone because of me, but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved."

When Jesus taught, there were times when his words were hard for people to accept. As Christians, our way of life will make us stand out. Jesus was the same way. Just as he drew people in, he also caused crowds to leave in droves (John 6:60-68). It’s unfortunate, but it’s true. Are you okay with not being everyone’s favorite in order to obey God?

And if people close to you walk away, trust me, there’s another group out there who believe like you do. You’ll probably find them at the church in a group or a class. They’ll walk with you and encourage you as you continue to encourage those who left you from a distance.

#3. Grace on Grace on Grace.

John 8:10-11 - Jesus straightened up and asked her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” “No one, sir,” she said. “Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin.”

Maybe you’re asking, "If I can’t just let the sin slide, then doesn’t that mean I’m judging them? That’s not love.” True…ish. It’s definitely not our place to judge or condemn. Very few people get judged into life change. The vast majority find themselves loved into it. In John 8, a crowd confronted Jesus with a woman caught in sin. When they wanted to condemn her, Jesus pointed out that we all have sin in our lives. We definitely don’t have a right to judge someone else’s sin. Jesus himself didn’t even condemn her (because that’s not what he does)! He passed on a wonderful gift of grace wrapped in an instruction of “stop doing that.” It’s a tightrope walk balancing grace and truth, but God has called us to carry both with us.  

The next time someone demands your acceptance, give them love. Not their version — God’s version. Speak God’s truth in love, encourage them, and show them Christ as you help them be the man or woman God made them to be.

For more on the topic of tolerance:

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As the Director of Vineyard Kids, my role is to lead our teams in creating an environment that engages the hearts and minds of the children of The Vineyard to help them recognize their identity in Christ and realize their potential in the Kingdom.

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